Gundam Flavored Kisses pt. 5
The color of his panties - with much apologies to Piers Anthony
Random mention of Akazukin cha cha, south partk and what not ^^ massive self insert *grins*

[ At a certain home in a certain town... ]

Rei: *typing insanely mumbling to self while sitting in front of the computer - a common occurence* its late i know its late its late i know its late its late i know its late i know its late its late i know its la-

1: *peers over shoulder* What are you doing?

R: fic. writing. of. its late i know its late i know its late i know its late

1: *wrinkles nose* Oh that. *pauses* that looks fun.

R: *shrugs* get away.

1: *leans closer* I wanna be in the fic!

R: . . . .What?

1: *louder* I wanna be in the fic!

R: *takes eyes off screen* *stare at sister* What?!?

1: *bounces* I wanna be in the fic! *beams*

R: No.

1: No?

R: N. O. NO.

1: *voice goes up an octave* No?

R: *flatly* No.

1: *yells* Julia, get your butt in here!

3: *peers around corner* Huh?

1: Get in the room!

3: Why?

1: Or else.

3: *shrugs* ok.

1: *points to R* Make her put me in the fic.

3:  . . . Huh?

1: *rolls eyes* I wanna be in the fic.  Make her.

3: *stares at 1* *stares at R who has gone back to typing frantically* Huh.

1: *proceeds to strangle 3 * Make. Her.

3: Ack *is strangled*

R: *continues to type*

1&3: *huddle in corner or more accurately 1 drags 3 down to ear level*

1: *calls out* Break! *giggles* Piiiika.

R: *twitches* damn.

3: Pika Pika

1: Chu?


3: Pika chu! Cha....

1: Pika PIka

3: Chu Chu?

1: Pi.

3: Chu!

1&3: Pikachu!

R: . . . .*twitch*

1: *moves to left side of R*

3: *moves to right side of R*

1&3: PIKA~!

R: *ears ring from stereo effect* Damn damn damn.

1&3: *inhale hugely* Pi-*stoppered by judiciously applied stuffed turtle doll to faces*

R:  All right, all right.  Chill.  Fine.  You're in the damn fic.

3: Me too?

R:  . . . Yeah.  Sure.  Whatever. *twitch*

1&3: Yay! v^.^ v^.^

R: *twitch* *types*

1: Hey, why am I 1?

R: Because you were born first.  Duh.

1:  *persists* Why aren't you 2 then?

R: Because.

3: That's not fair.

R: Tough.

1&3: *wails* That's not faaaaaaaair.

R:  . . . *beats them both with the stuffed koala doll*

1&3: *sulks in corner*

R: *shakes head* *types*

~GFK 5:  The color of his panties~

1: That's lame *yawns*

3:  . . . You stole that from Piers Anthony!

1&3:  You suck you suck you suck you suck.

R: Omae o korosu.

1&3:  Onna!  Are you listening?!? Onna!

R&1&3: *stare at each other* *burst into hysterical laughter* BWahahahahha!

*All stop* *stare again*

R: *retypes*

~GFK5:  The true gruesome murder tale of a much put upon second sibling who finally snaps, kills her two siblings, chops them up, and feeds them to her baby turtles who happened to be named Heero and Duo and therefore have something to do with GW~

R: *stares at both again after typing with a glazed look in eye- her eye is twitching noticeably*

1: *clears throat* Now that you mention it. . . .

3: Good title! v^.^

R: Hn.

~ GFK5:  The color of his panties~
with much apologies to Piers Anthony.

1&3: CHIRP~!!

R: *sighs*

1: *pauses* Wait.  The color of _his_ panties??

R: Yah.

1: _HIS_???

R:  Uh-huh.

1:  Then this is that yaoi thing, isn't it?

R: *slow evil grin* Possibly.

1: *bangs head* Lemme out lemme out lemme out!!

R: *smug look* Can't.  Fic's started already *points to above title*

1: *grabs 3* Make her lemme out!!

3: Huh?

1:  ARgghhhh!! *throws 3 away*

3: Huh?

R: *hands 3 a note card* Here.  Do something useful.

3: Huh?

R: *glares*

3: Ok... Gfk... gfk... that Duo and Trowa in drag pic!!!

R:  *sweatdrops*

1: That was cute~!

3:  *wooden voice which still manages to sound super cute 'nd perky*  I make no claims on anything in Gundam Wing.  I own nothing but my sanity.  Hah!

R: Oi Without the side commentary if'n you please.  *turns to 1* I thought you didn't like y~a~o~i.

1:  *smacks her*  I don't, but the pic was cute.

3:  I am poor.  Give me money.  Mail it to 135-

R: *smacks her* Stop that.

1:  Am I still in the fic?
: Yeah.

1: Oh.

Gundam Flavored kisses pt. 5 - The color of his panties (with much apologies to Piers Anthony)

When we last left our gender challenged protagonist and friend . . .

Duo Maxwell had finally discovered the second largest mystery of the ages:  why Heero's personality shifts from ice queen to studmuffin wrapped in spandex of love - the reasoning being one black clad butt belonging to said Maxwell person.

Flip up

Flip down

Flip up

Flip down.

Isn't scientific reasoning a wunnerous thing?

Of course the left Heero Yuy's long standing reputation as Mr. Stone Face changed to Mr. Stone Hard, not to mention rather susceptible to the whimsy of  random gusts of wind, Duo in any sort of mood, and anyone else who knew Heero's deep dark secret . . .

And he didn't like it one bit, nope nope nope not a bit.

Too bad that there was nothing he could do about it.

So far.

Trowa was still being pursued by Quatre and Quatre into what was rapidly degenerating into a Lancaster and York sort of dispute with the prize being Trowa chan's virtue instead of England's throne but ANYway, you decides which is more valuable.  This was after, of course, making a death defying escape from the 'commitment' question.
Could it be that our favorite banged boy was actually enjoying the chase?
Could it be that he was scared of commitment?
Or could it be that Quatre and Quatro was rather scary in their determination?

Wufei had fallen into a sort of stupor as he watched his hormonally peaked? imbalanced? students do the merry mating dance of mayhem which he had successfully avoided until now.


Until now.


 . . . . . .


Zechs and Treize were of course flaunting their secret teacher/student relationship for all to not notice.

 . . . . .

A paradox wrapped within an enigma ripened with age those two were think I suppose.

Kurama and Hiei were still being fabrically challenged; they were confused up to the point where both thong and jock strap worn together or separately or not at all seemed an appropriate wardrobe.

Poor non gundam pilot characters....

And all of them were leaving the skating rink; Heero in the lead.


"Heero!  Wait up!"

The Japanese boy chose to ignore Duo's exasperated cry.  A vulnerable point had been found on his impeccably stretched wall of spandex.  He'd have to eliminate it as soon as possible.  He didn't know how; he didn't know when, but he knew it had to be done somehow.

Gotta love a boy with motivation.

The best thing to do now was to stay away from the American, no matter how tightly the black panties would cling, no matter how the hemline would flirt outrageously with slim thighs, no matter how perfect a fi-


He needed a solution soon, his wall of spandex was contracting.

In more ways than one.

Heero walked faster.

Even as the blue eyed sweet cheeked pilot of Wing walked faster, a thinly disguised plot in the shape of a conflict of interest occurred.

It happened like this.

As shoujo heroines were wont to do, Duo, a lad with an excellent sense of balance at the best of times, tripped over nothing.  After a brief struggle wherein Duo tried desperately to avoid emitting the 'kyaa' which demanded to be voiced in a super kawaai burst of pink peony flowers, finally an exclamation of surprise emerged as a hybrid of the shoujo standard 'kyaaa', an ungraceful 'geh', Duo's typical 'k'so', and the squeak of a yellow rubber duckies, all of which combined, crossbred, and croaked into a sound much like the mating call of the oompah loompahs.

Now, if you've never been fortunate enough to hear that mellifluous call, just imagine a combo of a kya, geh, k'so, and squeak duking it out amongst themselves to be the dominant sound.

The whole point of this, of course, being a panty shot.

R: Panty shot... *checks last part* . . . 16.5!

1: .5?

R: It's a long story ^_^;; *points to gfk 1-4*

1: Ah. *starts reading* AHHHHH.

3: *reads over shoulder*...... I knew that.

And still Heero resisted, stopping, turning around, and comforting the tripped boy.  He was strong.
He possessed a will made of gundam and other meat by products.
He would prevail.

"Heero, watch out!"

He would.... walk into a metal pole.

He would leave a cute Heero shaped profile like impression in the metal.

He would next fall over with a grunt.

He would then watch as a suave looking bishounen helped Duo up, flirting oh so subtly.

And he would take it lying down.

Like _fun_ he would.

1: *looks up* Bishounen?

R: *shushes her** munches popcorn* This is the best part!

3: *sweatdrops*

"Ano. . . ojousan?  Are you all right?"  A smooth, warm hand popped into view as the stranger offered his help.  Duo sighed, silently calling for all the pits of hell to open under whatever gods forsaken idiot came up with the concept of the parody.  Then he silently cursed the damn fic writer who wrote him into the skirt so that yet again he was mistaken for a woman.  For good measure, he added a prayer that Heero would listen to reason.  Of all of these wishes, he had the highest hopes for the first two.

"Ah.  I'm fine.  Thanks."  The shonen turned shoujo turned shoujo transvestite though not transsexual replied, dusting himself off.  He looked up

 . . . and up

 . . . and up

 . . . it looked like rain today

 . . . then he remembered the oh so helpful stranger.  "Thanks again . . . ummm did I catch your name yet?"

"As a matter of fact, no."  The taller boy bowed courteously, sweeping up Duo's hand in a light kiss before adding, "My name is Hotohori.  I am from Konan high school."

1:  Wait a minute.

R: *watching avidly* Hm?

1: *points* You used the FY cast in part 4 as cross dressing transvestites.

R:  So?

1: What do you mean so??  It doesn't make sense to have them showing up again.

3&R: *for once in perfect accord- exchange blank looks*

R: *hesitantly as if one were explaining to a sane person which 1 was most definitely not*  It's not supposed to make sense.

1: *smacks her* Yes.  It.  Is!

R: *shrugs* Think of it this way.  There are several realities.  This is just one of them.  The Fy cast in drag doing a road tour of the Rocky Horror Picture Show is another reality.  They can co exist within the mind of the reader, the ficcer, and any other poor schmuck.  Capice?

1: *stares* Where'd you get that half assed theory from??

R: South Park *points to tv * Ne ne ne neeeee they were having this cute li'l episode where one of 'em kept reading philosophical books and this theory popped up and it was soooo interesting I couldn't help use it you know?

3: *nods for no reason* Chirp!

1:. . . . .

Duo stared at his hand, still held loosely in Hotohori's grasp.  "Umm.. Duo Maxwell.  Cherrywood High School.  And you should let go soon."  To emphasize his point, the skirted boy tugged at his hand.

"Oh, but of course, " the brown haired boy replied, ever solicitous, "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.  Please forgive me, Maxwell-san."

The American grinned flirtatiously.  "Well -I- don't mind, and you can just call me Duo or Shinigami, but...."  He paused and then stared fixedly to the left of the taller Konan boy's head.  "I'll just apologize head of time for my friend . . . "

Still trying to figure out the 'Shinigami' intro, the boy turned slightly.  "Eh?"  The perfect time to turn, actually, for he managed to just spot a blur of brown on green on black heading directly for him.  Then he saw a bright sky - Duo was right there were rain clouds forming but it'd take a while to reach their town, then flashing stars, then nothing.

3: *blinks* Why was he lucky?  He saw Heero but it didn't help. . . .

R: *maniacal grin*

1: I'm worried.

3: *nods*

R: *rewinds* Observe . . .

"-logize ahead of time for my friend . . . "

Still trying to figure out the 'Shinigami' intro, the boy turned slightly.  "Eh?"  Hotohotri looked surprised at the comment, and that was all he had time for as something rammed into his back, sending his perfectly proportioned skull bouncing off the concrete with a boingy clonk sound.  He then slipped into a deep coma which would last for 30 years.  After awakening from it, he would commit hara kiri for losing his good looks, hoping to be reborn in to a better shoujo manga, where being an Emperor meant something!

1:  That was mean.

3: *nods frantically*

1: *slow grin* So what would happen if he turned a minute later.

R: *smirks* Observe *rewinds*

"-logize ahead of time for my friend . . . "

Still trying to figure out the 'Shinigami' intro, the boy turned slightly.  "Eh?"  He turned around quickly, and instead of viewing a blur of brown on green on black, he saw a very pretty but angry as Tamahome being teased by Nakago angry look on the younger boy's face.

The expression of rage was tres in though and only served to increase the boy's aesthetic value <---- has no meaning.

Masaka . . .  could he surpass my beauty?  Frozen by that single thought, the Konan schooler sort of stood there like a bug, albeit a very pretty bug, on a stick<----- has even less meaning.

Then he saw black, stars, etc, as Heero tackled him like a professional.  Hut 1!

1: You really don't like Hotohori don't you?

R: *blinks oh so innocently* Oh, who me?  *demonic grin* No one rejects Nuri-chan and gets away with it *continues mumbling some other oh so not nice things*

1: That's nice and all... but where's my monk!!!

3: *eyes her eldest and therefore must be revered sister*  You know that didn't sound right.

1: Hush you! Where's Chichiri!! *grabs and shakes R... like a shake 'n bake box*

R: *fanatic gleam* *still mumbling* And then to marry that HOUKI character who looks exactly like Nuri chan... damn idiot doesn't know how to appreciate something that's right in front of him and DAMMIT NURI DIDN'T DESERVE HIS FATE!!!!

1: *still shaking* Chichiri! Chichiri! Chichiri!

3: ^_^; *adjusts settings* Back to regular programming folks... *pauses* CHIRP

"Heero, you . . . you . . . .you . . ."

"Baka, moron, thrice damned spandex dipped fool, " supplied a too helpful Quatro.  The rest of the Cherrywood gang had gathered 'round the tackled Hotohori.  No that it matters but Quatre and Quatro had managed to pin Trowa against a tree.  Something citrusy *could* have been happening if the two rich boys decided to double team the object of their sparkling loins.

1: . . . . .

R: *muses* Well, I've had everything else sparkle....

3: Not their di-

1: *smacks her*

Unfortunately, the two were too busy beating each other into blonde splotches in the sidewalk.

"Omae o korosu, Quatre."

"It wasn't me, Heero.  It was my evil twin!"

An utter and absolute silence much like cooled, congealed artificial cheese from McDonald's fell over the entire cast as in a blinding instant of epiphany, everyone realized that this very line was the sole reason for the creation of Quatro.

His brother of course was laughing hysterically.  His nemesis - the bane of this fic and the sole obstacle to winning Trowa's bang was created for the purpose of *his* reciting one corny, over used line.  It was too much for his fragile mind and he collapsed, howling, on the pavement.

Quatro, however, had entered into a deadly calm, acquiring the oh so sexy I will blow you and your colony up Wing Zero look so favored by the gundam crowd, accessories not included.

Trowa was being Trowa which was to say birds of all sorts had gathered all around him chirping busily, chipmunks where chattering in the branches of the tree above him, and a few squirrels had taken up residence in his bang.

1:  He'd make a good Snow White. . .

R: Been there, done that, got the fic to prove it.

3: . . . . . CHIRP

1&R: *fall over*

3: chirp v~.^

Duo took it upon himself to berate the ever stoic except in times of underwear flashing Heero Yuy, mainly because the Japanese boy wouldn't wipe the smirk off his face.  Of course, to others perhaps there was no smirk.  Just a faint tug at the corner of the mouth, a certain sheen to the eyes, the arrogant, faintly challenging til of the head . . . .

Or maybe Duo was an empath which was more likely.

Or perhaps he enjoyed pacing back and forth in front of Heero, waving his hand and braid about to emphasize his points -whatever they may have been - the fic author certainly wasn't paying attention.  Not to mention the way Heero continued to eye his legs and the way the skirt's hemline would rise with every gesture, they were all encouraging signs.

Hell, if he was going to be a sex object, he would *enjoy* being a sex object.

And Wufei . . . Wufei being the calm, cool headed boy he always was


R: Well sometimes he is.

1&3:  ONNA!

R: Quit that *clutches ears*

1&3:  ONNA!

R:  What?! What?! What?!?

1: ONNA!

3:  We're hungry

1: ONNA!

1&3:  *fall giggling onto the floor*

R: *twitch* *attempts to stomp on them as they roll around on the floor*

found a cold compress from somewhere (perhaps from the loose white pants he always wore...) and was applying said compress to Hotohori's poor knocked out head.  He also bundled up his blazer and used it as a cushion for the older boy's much abused skull.

Kurama had dragged Hiei away for ice cream, taking in the fact that everyone else including the crazed threesome was busily occupied in some form or shape.

The last thing he needed was a complication.  And from the looks of it everything was going to get complicated.

Smart kitsune.

This was the scene in which a certain twosome from Konan high arrived at.  The female took it upon herself to immediately scream, "Kyaaa!!! Hotohori's dead!!!"

1&3: *bounce up* Kyaa kyaa kyaaa *run all around* kyaaaaaaaaa

R:  Hn.  How'd Miaka get into this fic? *sweatdrops*

1: Don't look at me, you're writing it.

3: Kyaaaa~!

1:  *smacks 3 upside the head* Idiot.  It's over.

3: *sulks in corner*

R: And I said begone! *Miaka disappears*

Tamahome: Miaka!

1: *clutches ears* Do something!

R: How'd he end up here? *sweatdrops* Oh well... you have amnesia!

T: I do?

R: Yup.

T: No, I don't.

R: *watches calmly as an anchor approximately the size of a cruiser lands on his head*  . . . Yes you do.

1&3:  . . . . .

T: Oro? Where am I?  Who am I? *stare at girls*  Who're you?

1&3: *hands clasped to faces, huge googly eyes* Arararara Maa maa maa. *as one they sweatdrop*

1: *turns to R who's busily filing her nails*   . . . Chacha?

R *beams* Doesn't Riiya look a lot like Tamahome?  The cute ponytail, his loyalty, his inhuman strength, etc?

3:  *in the background* Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa

1: *sweatdrops* *stares at cutely confused Tamahome* What're you going to do with him?

2: *evil Nuriko type smirk* Ohohohoh... Complications *significant wiggle of the eyebrows*

1: *smacks her absently* Stop that.  Do I wanna know?

3: Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa Arararara Maa maa maa

1: *chucks a teddy bear from fao schwartz twice her size at 3*  Hush you.

3: *sulks in corner*

R: *ignores her siblings* *snaps fingers at T* You!

T: Huh?

R *points to Wufei* You are desperately and madly in love with that boy. You've been reincarnated together - this life time is just the latest in a long series of life times.  He hasn't realized it yet, and its up to you to reawaken his past memories not to mention his deep, true feelings for you.  It's your duty, nay your privilege, nay your mission!

Heero: Mission.

1: *thumps him upside the head* Stop that.

H: *sulks in corner along with 3*

R: *still ranting*  . . . destiny!  Saaaaaa, go Tamahome and awaken his slumbering ardor.  Be the prince charming to his sleeping beauty! *whips out a fan from nowhere in particular and snaps it closed*  Go forth young knight!

T: Mission acknowledged.
1&3: Arararara Maa maa maa

H: Omae o korosu *glares both at Tamahome and the girls*

R: *still babbling on to a starry eyed T* *absently flips up Duo's skirt*

H: *grabs Duo* *bends the boy over one arm* Mon amour, mon chere, ma raison d'etre.  je'taime.  je t'adore *breaks out karaoke set* Voulez vous couchez avec moi ce soir.

1&R&3: Arararara Maa maa maa *starts dancing a chibi sakura blossom dance complete with weird coordinated hand / feet movements and fans. R's fan reads P. S. 17.5!!*

Wufei quickly found himself the object of Tamahome's worhshipping gaze.  He also found his hands grasped in an unrelenting though non bruising grip and try as he may couldn't free his hands.

"Wufei . . ." murmured the blue haired boy huskily.  "Why fight this feeling between us?  We were meant to be."

And the Chinese boy to his horror and disgust felt a blush spread rapidly.  The look in the other boy's eyes was so sincere and trusting.... With a burst of strength, the dark haired boy freed himself and ran off.  "Natakuuuuuuuuuu."

The oni boy frowned.  "Nataku?"  Those warm brown eyes which had so thoroughly mesmerized the Shenlong pilot became twin gouts of burning vengeance.  "My rival!"  He gave chase.

Hotohori was being unconscious in an utterly becoming and bish way 'o course.  But he was still unconscious, unaware of the conflict wrapped in a delicious but fragile crust of plot which was still in motion.

Heero, in compliance with this delectable development, though still sucking face and neck and other sites of interest, unobtrusively kicked Hotohori's knocked out, lax,though nicely toned body down the hill.  Where it rolled and rolled and rolled and...

R:  Mwahahahaha

1: *looks up from an issue of Cosmopolitan* That was mean.

R: Nah.

1: Yeah, it was.

R: *smiles beatifically* No... This is mean.

 . . . and rolled and rolled and rolled right into the path of Relena's pink limo which for no known reason was driven by the ultra cool Dorothy.  Thankfully for Rlena's insurance rates and Hotohori , how would they explain a minor driving the vehicle Queen of the World or not, the car halted in time.  Relena, amazed at the disturbance, got out of the back and spotted a tall figure with oodles of rippling greenish tinged hair staggering to his feet.  She hesitantly approached the man then gave a little squeak as he slumped into her arms, unconscious, a faint lingering scent of lavender and vanilla pleasantly permeating her somewhat dazed senses.

"Relena sama?"  Dorothy stared at the form in the other girls' arms.  "Daijoubu?"

The girl carefully turned the boy over, brushing the way ward locks of hair out of the way, smoothing away the tangles as well.  Her breath caught as she saw Hotohori's face for the first time.  Here was a poor soul who had rol- wandered into her life, right when all hopes of capturing Heero's heart was gone.

It was a sign.

With a happy sigh, Relena clutched the boy tighter.  "My prince . . . ."

Dorothy sighed and tilted her head to the side, regarding the possibly serious situation before her.  "Not again..."

R:  See?

1: You're right.  That was meaner... *grins*

R: *smirks* . . . . *looks around* Where's 3??

1: *starts* Hmm? *looks around as well* oops...

1&R:  *stare at each other*  Uh oh...

1: *shrugs*

R: *whips out mudslides*

1&R: *both take sips* Arararara Maa maa maa

But there was no need to fear - not that the other two were sweating it out in any case - for 3 had taken it upon herself to find the true object of her affections, namely food.  She came upon Kurama and Hiei still scarfing ice cream down - or rather the little koorime enjoying his fifth triple fudge brownie with assorted nuts, cream and choco syrup.

Kurama shortly found himself subject to a puppy dog expression, huge sparkly brown eyes, and a quivering lip - the likes of which he hadn't seen since his last sojourn into shoujo animehood.  He sighed and called for a menu.  Hiei merely grunted and continued noshing.

3, with a happy squeal, seated herself at their table, next to Kurama and opposite Hiei, bringing a quirk to the red head's lips.  He'd feed her than return her later on.

After all how much food could she pack away?


"Heero and Duo kissing in the street. K-I-S-S-I-N-G .  First comes love, then comes marriage.  Then comes duo with a baby carriage."

"Quatre, please remain quiet."

"Who're you ordering around, short stuff?!"

"You know very well that we're the same height."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yes.  I'm quite sure."

"Well... well I hate you!"

"So my space heart tells me."


Mothers on a walk with their children fastidiously avoided the oak tree.  Not only was there a couple exchanging bubblegum and spit underneath the branches but there were also two fiercely arguing blondes up *in* the branches.

"This is all your fault!"

"No yours."




Duo, coming up for breath, peered up above them, finally noticing the quibbling twosome, and asked, "Why are they up there."  He grabbed Heero's wandering hand and placed it firmly over his bottom.

Ever observant even whilst attempting to make Duo's toes curl Heero snorted, "Trowa got sick of them and called the birds to carry them up there.  Then the mice sewed the two to the branches."

" . . .  . .??"

He nodded in affirmation.  "Mice."

Simultaneously, the both grunted.  "Hn."

"Oh cute, real cute.  Next thing you know, they'll be completing each others' sentences, " sneered, he did sneer real well being the evil sibling, Quatro.

"That'd be adorable!"

"Shut up."

"Make me."

"Why you. . . "

Ignoring the ensuing, or was it continuing?, argument above, the two below continued their intense petting/fondling/groping/justplainheavybreathing session.  A romantic scene, even if both their eyes were rather glazed over, hair mussed, shirts half undone, skirt hitched tantalizingly high, and

1: *smacks her* Enough.  You're drooling.

R:  *glares* Weren't you going to go look for our sib?

1: She's fine.

R: *raises eyebrow* Oh?

1:  *smug look* My space heart said so.

R: . . . . .

But before the two could consume

1: *skeptical look* Under a tree?  In public?

R: *dead pan* There's always the bush. . . .

1: I'm missing something here.

R: *shrugs* Where to start, where to start.

1: . . . . PIKA!!!

R: *sighs*

Perhaps this fic would have stopped here but for that thinly disguised plot still wandering around causing problems and most importantly - weakening walls of probability.  Certain walls like the walls keeping apart anime series/fandoms... but that's for later.

1: South Park?

R: Nah... Just made that one up.

1: *sighs* Why do I bother? *yanks her hair*

R: *glares* DIE!! *tackles her*

1: *is tackled*

Suddenly, a lion trotted up to them, carefully carrying a message wrapped in saran wrap.  If you don't know *why* the saran wrap is needed - you try sticking your head in a lion's mouth and see how dry *your* head comes out.

Heero, deciding his abnormal strength would be handy at times like this, confronted the lion by staring straight into its eyes.  He pushed Duo to safety behind him... Only the braided boy wasn't really safe because he pushed a *little* too hard and Duo ended up in the busy street.  Needless to say but we'll say it anyway, he made it back to safety, with absolutely no help from the peanut gallery in the branches - Quatro jeering at his ability to dodge and cheering on the cars, Quatre urging Duo's space heart to take flight - or else the series would end far sooner than planned.

R: *peers up from reading manga* Plan?  What plan?

1: Aren't you being a bit too casual?  This is Duo's action sequence; he could get maimed, groped, or otherwise seriously undead!

R: *gleam in eye* He can't die, he's death!!! *goes back to reading manga*

After two stepping around a semi, jete'ing over two cyclists who immediately sprouted nosebleeds causing cars to slip and slide and from a 20 car pile up involving lots of cool boombs, and splitting open a pick up truck with his forehead as a last resort, Duo finally made it safely back.  Though considering the sidewalk to be safe with a trigger happy boyfriend in a face off with a claw happy? <---what meaning? lion wasn't much of anything really.

Not that Heero cared; he was too thoroughly occupied in the staring contest.  One false move and he'd be the vicious animal's next dinner.

R: *snorts*

1: What?

R: dinner... more like appetizer or a midday snack.

1: *glances at Heero* He is sorta sparse on meat. . .

R: v^^ But he's stacked in all the right places.!

1: v^^ Yeah! *face in hand* What am I saying....

R: *shrugs* *back to manga*

A small drop of sweat jogged its way down the Wing pilot but for the purpose of this fic regular, everyday high school student's face.  Then, a blur of braid and fuku came barreling out from behind him.

"Duo!"  Heero couldn't believe it.  The American boy was sacrificing himself for . . .

"Lion saaan!"  Duo glomped the lion enthusiastically, the large beast affectionately rubbing its head against the boy as well.


"Lion saan~! Where's Trowa?"

The lion solemnly spat out the message it had been holding.  The violet eyed boy resignedly picked up the sopping wet object, peeling the paper from the plastic distastefully.

(Help.  Been kidnapped again.  Not happy about it. -Trowa

PS  Its *him* again.)

"Well, damn."  Duo gingerly set the message down, scritching the lion in praise behind the ears.  He glanced up when Heero, carefully eyeing the rumbling lion, walked up to him.

"Explain."  A peculiar strained note had wormed its way into the Japanese boy's usually terse tone.  Having one's groping partner through himself into the very jaws of death and come out alive and scritching will do that to a spandex person.

"Ehehehe.  Well, this is  Lion san, Trowa's pet lion.  Lion-san, this is Heero - my err.. that is .. um... a mutual acquaintance of Trowa and myself."

Feeling slightly disappointed at Duo's bland introduction but for what reason Heero couldn't fathom for were they not mere acquaintances (acquainted with each other's tonsils, tongues, teeth, dental work....), the boy nodded in greeting.

Lion san nodded back.

Before he could even *begin* to take that in, the American dropped another bombshell on him and no, it wasn't Marilyn Monroe.

"Trowa's been kidnapped again," stated Duo quite cheerfully, ignoring both Heero's non verbal glare of disbelief and the twin screeches from the branches above him.  He started down the street; Lion san trotting obediently at his heels.  The crowd parted like hot fudge running down a mountain of whip cream.

"Well aren't you coming, " the fuku'ed (please don't read this the wrong way...) boy turned slightly at the waist, glancing at Heero curiously, the warm spring breeze doing its usual thing with clothing.

R: *sweatdrops* You have to wonder if Wind is hentai...

What choice did our hero have?  He followed.

R: *chirps* And that's it for this week!  Tune in for the next installment where all will not be revealed!

Will Trowa be rescued?
Who is his mysterious kidnapper?
Will Heero find a cure?
Will Quatre and Quatro *ever* catch Trowa?
Does Trowa care?
Will Tamahome catch Wufei?
Does Wufei want to be caught?
What happened to Zechs and Treize?
Will Kurama's wallet survive both Hiei and 3?
What happens to Hotohori?
Will Dorothy take a stab at him too?
Where's the rest of the FY cast?
Where's Nurichan????

1: *smacks her* Enough!

R: *narrows eyes* May all your children be just like you.

1: Die!! *tries to dead her*

R: *is dead* *purple pocky scented chibi spirit rises out of body and float off cackling*

1: Oops *shoves body under bed* Eheheheh... *whips out purple pocky scented chibi spirit catching net* Oh jooo joooooooooooo.....

To be continued. . . .

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