Only Happy When It Rains

**This is a sequel to JJ's wunnerful fic, Childhood's End. You can find it here ^_^ My fic won't make much sense without it *huge sweatdrop*

**I took the liberty and what not that the colonies are all climate controlled and the weather is also run by machines. I.E. no seasons, no rain, etc. unless it's programmed in ^^

**And I also played around with the song lyrics, which are by Garbage. ^^ So there.

I'm only happy when it rains
I'm only happy when it's complicated
And though I know you can't appreciate it
I'm only happy when it rains

The tall, too slender figure stood in the midst of the storm, face upturned towards the raging heavens, hands held loosely at his sides, palms held upward as if seeking guidance. The thin shirt and dress slacks were plastered to his body, outlining every sleek line of his body. He stayed that way until the downpour slackened, until the sleets of rain had numbed his body, his thoughts.

And she could only watch from the window, half hidden behind drawn curtains, lips drawn in a thin line.

You know I love it when the news is bad
And why it feels so good to feel so sad
I'm only happy when it rains

He opened his mouth, letting the cool water run down his face, the rivulets running through his hair felt like the smooth fingers of a lover's curious, soothing touch.


The slim body turned from the balcony, wandering though the sliding doors which had been left open to let in the rain and wind. The look on that heart shaped face, at that moment, was wistful, while at the same time, dark memories seeming to overwhelm those expressive eyes. But then the cloudy expression cleared and the familiar half smirk, half smile reappeared and the moment was gone, vanishing as if it never had been.

-Eh? Heero, sorry. Is the rain bothering you?-

-No.-He tilted his head towards the storm outside, eyebrow barely twitching upwards in a silent question. And Duo, with his uncanny knack for reading his expressions, guessed what he was asking. Sometimes, Heero thought that the American pilot could read his thoughts...

-Hmmm, 's nothing. I just like the rain.- The long haired boy once more looked outside, a sudden jagged bolt of lightning casting shadows across his normally smooth face. He let out a low, soft laugh at the other boy's disbelieving snort, the sound causing a tingle of pleasure to run along Heero' spine. -Well, if you insist.- In a sudden movement, Duo suddenly turned around, braid whipping about the slender body, hand on hips, head tilted to the side with a self-mocking smile firmly in place. -I'll tell you a little story.- He sat down smoothly before the sliding windows, Indian-style, shoulders slightly hunched over. All Heero could see of his lover's face was the glimmer of violet eyes beneath too long bangs. Duo gestured for the Japanese boy to take a seat.

-Well, once on this colony, there was this poor orphanage.- He waved a finger in a playfully scolding motion when it looked as if Heero would interrupt. -Ah, ah, ah. This is a story, so you have to listen until the very end. Anyway, there was a boy who lived there. Let's call him Solo. Now Solo was a horrible little child, he refused to listen to the people who ran the orphanage, no matter how kindly they treated him. He was selfish and refused to cut his dirty, long hair, even when he knew they barely had enough rationed water to drink much less to wash with.- The boy fiddled with the tip of his long braid, head titled downwards. -One day ... one day, the boy's stubbornness and sheer idiocy went too far... and they all died. He was the only one to survive as a matter of fact, but it didn't matter, you see. He survived and as an added bonus, he even got to keep his hair. And the boy came down to earth and was amazed at the water that was found there. The people there... they played in it, they complained if there was too much, and all the boy could remember was his days on that colony...- Duo tilted his head, letting the braid slide out of his fingers and pool in his lap. -So you see, Heero, that selfish brat likes to watch the rain fall, likes to feel it against his skin.-

The Japanese boy didn't say anything, couldn't say anything in the face of that blatant self hate that the other boy hid so well. It mirrored his own.

Pour your misery down, pour your misery down on me
Pour your misery down, pour your misery down on me

"Heero." She greeted him curtly, raising a cool eyebrow as if surprised at his soaked appearance, trembling hands kept curled in tight fists by her side.

"Relena..." He uttered her name softly, in that intense quiet way that had once drawn at her heart. In that tone, convincing her of the millions of words and feelings, she was sure he felt for her, things that would never be spoken but were nevertheless present in that one word. Now... She could only watch helplessly, frustrated, as that one word, combined with the dismissive glance from those cold, prussian blue eyes, flicked over her and then ignored her presence. She couldn't understand him even now, after all this time. When she was younger, things were different, *she* was different. And now...

The blonde woman took a deep breath, smoothing out the invisible wrinkles in her soft silk dress, determined to get him to talk this one time. "Hee-" She never managed to finish his name. Back stiff, he had already left the room, shutting the door behind him, leaving her with one hand half curled towards him, as always.

And as always, she could only finished her sentence softly, to herself. "-eero, onegai... "

I'm only happy when it rains
I feel good when things are going wrong
I only listen to the sad, sad songs
I'm only happy when it rains

The rain had fallen outside the cathedral the day when he had failed. Heero's lips twisted at the irony of it. He had always complained over the American pilot's seemingly sloppy tactics and laid back attitude. But when it had really counted, he had hesitated...

And his laughing partner, the one who should have survived, the one who had *always* struggled to live no matter what the cost, no matter how deep the pain, had paid for the "Perfect Soldier"'s hesitation.

Despite the constant fall of rain that day, it wouldn't wash away the blood of his fallen friend ... his fallen lover. Even now, after the deaths of the soldiers and civilians had faded somewhat in his mind, the warm, sticky, sickening feel of that warm liquid spilling across his hands and legs still remained.

I only smile in the dark
My only comfort is the night gone black
I didn't accidentally tell you that
I'm only happy when it rains
You'll get the message by the time I'm through
When I complain about me and you
I'm only happy when it rains

So with the rain came the memory of that day, bringing with it the searing realization that Duo was no longer here because of his own failure.

But those memories helped to keep Duo alive in his mind. Heero would cling to those rainy day memories as long as he could, no matter how pathetic it was.

Just as his dead lover had kept his own rainy dead memories, of lost loved ones and a childhood denied.

Another bitter smile crossed the Japanese pilot's lips. It was only just.

You can keep me company
As long as you don't care
I'm only happy when it rains
You wanna hear about my new obsession?
I'm riding high upon a deep depression
I'm only happy when it rains (Pour some misery down on me)

Again, she kept watch at the window as another rainy day passed. The tall man would stand in the rain, gazing up at the turbulent skies as he always did. She always wondered what he saw... The laughing visage of his ... partner or perhaps the last memory that *she* had of him, slumped over and dying, those laughing lips flecked in crimson and drawn in a grimace of pain.

But he had managed one last smile, however weak and shaky, for Heero. A last painful effort for the sake of the boy kneeling beside him.

And the woman wondered when the figure standing out in the rain would simply disappear into the storm, leaving her behind, wondering if today would be the day.

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