Warning! Contains some yaoi and lime elements!

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Bandai. The Twilight Zone, and the "do do do do's" belongs to someone. I'm just now sure who. I'm Po' (can't afford the "or") so please don't sue me!

Chibi Talking Quatre

Dr. J's voice can be heard as we take a journey through space and time. "do do do do. do do do do. "You're travelling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind; a journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. There's a signpost up ahead - your next stop, the Twilight Zone!"

"A simple doll. It is the source of so much joy for a child. It can be a best friend, or a pretend child. The doll you are about to witness is a very special doll, for this doll as a mind and motives of its zone. On the backside of the doll, there is a stamp, and it reads "Made in the Twilight Zone."


"Oi!! Heero. If finally got here! You have to see it!" Duo yelled as he came running from the mailbox. "I finally got it! The doll I won on ebay!"

Heero let out an exhausted sigh. His last mission had proven to be a tiring one, and now he was looking forward to a little downtime. He didn't need Duo ranting a raving about a stupid doll.

The Wing Zero pilot hopped out of his bed and groggily walked out to the living room where he saw Duo frantically tearing away at package. "Ok, Duo I'll see your doll. Just promise you'll let me get some rest afterwards, ok?"

Duo nodded emphatically. "Ok! I don't have much time anyway. I'm going out in a few minutes. I just wanted to see my new toy!" He replied.

Duo opened the package and stared wide-eyed at the contents. He scratched his head and then held the box up to Heero "Wow! It looks just like Quatre! He's gonna love this."

Heero just stared at the doll. "You bid on a Quatre doll? Baka! That was a waste of money." With that said and done, he walked back into his bedroom and flopped down on his bed before doing back to sleep.

Back in the living room, Duo cleaned up his mess, and threw away the trash. He then picked up his new toy and smiled. "I don't care what Heero says. I think you're great!" he said to the doll. The doll just gave him a molded plastic smile as if it understood what Duo was saying. Duo then dropped the Quatre doll on the couch and left the house to run some errands.

Heero woke up to the sound of a faint scratching at his bedroom door. He staggered out of bed and flung the door open half-expecting Duo to be there. "Dammit Duo! I'm trying to sleep!" But there was no one there, so he closed the door and jumped back into bed. If he had bothered to look down, he would have seen a tiny doll slip past his legs, into the room and under his bed.

As Heero began drifting off to sleep, he was caught in that strange world between sleep, and conciouness. That place where the body is resting, but at the same, it is aware of its surroundings. Suddenly, Heero felt a light brushing against his thighs. He sighed softly in his sleep, and then rolled over. "Mmmm...Duo, not now. When I wake up." But the touch persisted. In fact, it got a bit more violent. He felt hands roaming his chest, and he felt breath on his neck. "Duo! I said..."

"Hi, my name is Talking Chibi Quatre, and I'm going to kill you." The Doll was in his face; it's hand clutching a wicked looking ice pick. It swiped downward, but the Japanese boy was too fast. He rolled out of the bed and onto the floor. When he sprang to his feet, he grabbed the doll and ran out of his room. "Duo Maxwell!!! What is wrong with you? That was not funny!"

A few seconds later, Duo came skipping through the door. He saw a fuming Heero holding his doll. "Ne, Heero. I'm glad you're awake. Oh you like my Quatre doll? Isn't it neat?"

"That wasn't a funny joke, Maxwell. Someone could get hurt!" He said as he ripped the ice pick from the doll's hands and flung them both across the room. The doll landed on its butt, and smiled a little doll smile.


Hours later Trowa was relaxing in a tub. His muscles were very sore from a rigorous workout, so he decided to treat himself to a bath. In classic slasher film fashion, steam filled the bathroom, so that the visibility was close to zero. And of course, the door was slightly ajar.

Trowa was dozing off in the tub so he never heard the pitter pat of tiny plastic feet walking across the linoleum. He didn't feel the slight disturbance in the water as a Chibi Quatre doll slipped into the tub with him. Strangely enough, the doll was unarmed this time It used molded plastic hands to gently stroke Trowa to arousal. Trowa moaned gently as he felt his lover stroke him. "Quatre...don't stop.Please don't stop."

"My name is Chibi Talking Quatre and Iím going to f**k you."

Trowa stifled a giggle. "I love games. What do you want me to do?"

"Hands free and eyes closed" replied the doll as it continued stroking Trowas erect member.

Moments later, an enraged Trowa emerged from the bathroom, with a limp to his step. "Quatre! Where are you?!? QUATRE!!!"

The Arabian gundam pilot jumped up from what he was doing and quickly ran to Trowa. "Trowa? What's wrong? I heard you yelling." "You know damn well what's wrong! I you know how much I hate it when you're rough like that."

"Trowa, what are you talking about?" Asked Quatre.

"You were in the bathtub with me. You entered me without any lube. Plus you bit me way too hard."

"Trowa are you feeling all right?" Quatre asked as he put a hand to Trowa's forehead. "I wasn't in the tub with you. I've been with Heero going over specs to an OZ munitions depot. Are you sure you weren't dreaming?"

"Does this look like a dream to you?" Trowa yelled as he pointed to small bite marks on his inner thighs.

Quatre blushed a deep crimson, getting deeply aroused as he eyed his lover. He snapped out of his trance and looked at Trowa. "Ummm..Trowa, my teeth aren't that small. Look at the bite marks."

Trowa looked down at the tiny bite marks, but something else caught his eye. He saw a pair of wet footprints in the carpet, and they led straight to Duo's room.


Duo was sitting in his room putting clothes back on his Chibi Quatre Doll. "What happened to you? One of the other guys must have decided you needed a bath or something. Well, at least you smell squeaky clean. And they used my favorite bath gel from Bath and Body Works too! How nice!"

The door to Duo's room flew open and in stepped Quatre and Trowa.

"Duo, may we have a word with you" Quatre asked.

"Ummm..sure. What's this all about?"

Quatre noticed that the doll's hair was still wet, and then he put 2 and 2 together. "Duo! What did you do to Trowa? You used a doll???"

"What? I didn't do anything! I've been arguing with Heero for the past couple of hours. He swears up and down that I put my Chibi Quatre Doll in his room and tried to make it attack him or something. It can't fight. It's just a doll!"

"Something weird is going on, Duo. Dolls just don't go around f**king people on their own. But I saw wet footprints in the carpet." said Trowa.

"So you think my doll really tried to kill Heero?"

"Yeah, and it screwed me and pretended to be *my* Quatre."

Heero walked in on the tail end of the conversation. "I know what we should do with that doll"

"What?" Duo asked? "Send it to Zechs?"

"No. Send it back and get your money back of course! Then you can use the money and take us all out to make up for the damage your doll caused."

"Awwwww." Duo whined as he handed the doll over to Heero.


Days later, Dr. J received a package. Inside were a doll, and a very harsh letter.

"Hi. My name is Chibi Talking Quatre, and I'm..."

"Oh shut up." Dr. J said as he opened the back and flipped the off switch. It was then he realized his mistake. "Dammit! I sent him the wrong one. This is the Chibi Talking Quatre Zero System Edition!"


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